Lones.

I realized that I've been too attached to A, spending too much time with him, and then cooping myself up at home as and when I have the chance to do so. It isn't that healthy huh.

That's number one. Secondly, you know how I've been thinking about what I want to do in future and all (the partial reason why I stopped schooling after getting my dip, and started working). It just came to a conclusion that I don't have that many choices anyway. I'm just gonna either take something that business related or supply chain related. It's just either something more specialized, or broader, like what I studied in poly, and then just graduate and see where I land at. I can't take forever to think about what I want. I don't think it'll just appear infront of me as a vision. It wouldn't work that way. I don't want to procrastinate to a stage whereby I can't be bothered to study anymore/ feel too old to be in school.

Thirdly, I need to go back to church.

Lastly, I need to learn to love more. I've been neglecting people around me, and definitely taking people for granted. I always say that. I don't always do it. I have a horrible temper which many don't see. I have crazy mood swings which I don't really show.

I don't feel complete. I feel that life now, is pretty different from what it used to be. I'm actually contented with just less than a handful of people in my life these days. At the same time, I wish I had more people I could turn to. The self-centered me would feel more secure, somehow. What if Flo really goes abroad to study. What if I'm not with A anymore. What if's. It's where the insecurities creep in. Thankfully, it's only times where I'm that free to reflect that all these thoughts do creep in. I'm grateful for all that's in my life now. I'm not upset or anything. Just needed somewhere to type all these.